Wednesday, May 14, 2008

The First Step To Getting Your Ex Wife Back

Author: Julie Campbell

In order to convince your ex lover that it’s not over and you want to rebuild your relationship with her, you need to let her know that you still care. The first step for rebuilding a relationship with your ex girlfriend, your ex wife, or your ex partner is to communication with her.

The following are a few suggestions on how you can effectively and positively restart communication and reach out to your ex to get your girlfriend or wife back.

Don’t wait for your ex to contact you – Be the bigger person and don’t wait for your ex lover to make the first move, because it may never happen. After you have been separated for a week or two, give her a quick call, or send a short email to say a friendly “hello” and ask her how she is doing. By taking this first step to contact her, you let her know that you care and are still thinking about her.

Communication is not something you should rush! – Once you establish communication, take it slow and work on sharing the communication by inviting her to contact you, or set up a time when it would be best to call her. Don’t phone your ex wife 50 times a week and leave messages on her answering machine, or inundate your ex girlfriend with email messages. You also shouldn’t show up frequently at her place of work, or “coincidentally” run into her in the shopping mall, grocery store, coffee shop, etc.

Too much contact does not only make you appear desperate, which is very unappealing, it is also very annoying. The last thing you want to do is irritate your ex further, as this will only resurface negative emotions and create an even bigger tear in your relationship.

Make yourself available – Let your ex lover know that you are open to communication and are readily available to talk. You must make it clear to her that you are not pressuring her, but that you are there for her when she needs you.

Work on positive communication – Positive communications primarily means you shouldn’t play the blame game, or rehash any of the negative emotions you feel which can lead to arguments. However, positive communication also means that you shouldn’t be pushy when attempting your getting back with ex goal.
Communications need to be progressive not aggressive. You need to let your ex wife know that you still love her and want to be with her, and tell her why you believe your relationship is worth another shot. You also need to let her know that you are willing to compromise and make changes to better meet her needs.

Be wary of other people’s advice – Although your friends and family mean well, sometimes their communication recommendations to help win back the heart of your ex girlfriend / wife will only drive her farther away. In order to reach the heart of your ex, you need to let your own heart guide you. You are beyond the point of sending gifts and flowers. Now is the time to be unique, creative, and personal. Remember what she loves about you, and use this to your advantage.

A breakup does not mean the end of a relationship. Relationships end when both lovers agree it is time to move on separately with their lives. Thus, you need to open up positive communications and make your feelings known to your ex lover before you lose your chance of getting back with ex altogether.

For more information visit:
http://www.myexback.com/exwife.htm

Wednesday, October 31, 2007

Do You Really Want Your Ex Wife Back?

Author:- Julie Campbell


Many people who break up with their ex girlfriend believe they are better off without them, and the same can be said for those who break up with their ex wife. While this is true in some cases, it may not be the case for you and your ex lover.
Believing you are better off without someone in your life is usually the result of feeling hurt or betrayed by that person. Thus, you need to take the time to do some serious soul searching to decide if its time to move on ahead without your ex, or if its time to devise a plan to get her back.
If you decide that getting back with ex lover is the better option, you need to create a realistic plan of action that you can commit to. The following is a 5-step plan designed to help you put your life into perspective, as it is imperative that you first set your own priorities and emotions straight before you attempt to win back your ex. After all if you can’t be true to yourself and feelings, how can you be true to your ex girlfriend, or sincere about wanting your wife back?
1. Give yourself healing time – You need time to heal. Don’t attempt to make contact with your ex wife, ex girlfriend, or partner until you have had time to cope with your emotions, have cooled your anger, and are ready to engage in positive and constructive communication.

2. Find out what went wrong to avoid making the same mistakes – Although you may believe that your breakup was the result of a single action or event, in actuality, it’s possible that your relationship came to an end for a number of reasons, many of which started well before the main catastrophe. You need to learn what the causes were of the breakup with your ex lover and how many of these causes are attributed to the things you did or did not do.

3. Dump the guilt – you need to absolve yourself of any guilt you may be harboring. Forgiveness is an absolute must if getting back with ex is essential to you. However, before you can forgive your ex partner, you need to forgive yourself. When you are able to stop placing blame on yourself and your lover, you will rid yourself of a slew of negative emotions including anger, bitterness, pettiness, and resentment, and allow for positive emotions to take over your better judgment.

4. Have confidence in yourself - Don’t beg your ex to come back. The object isn’t to show your ex lover that your life can’t go on without her, the goal is to show her how much you want and need her love. Thus, you need to take charge of your own life and make it obvious that you can stand on your own two feet. You need to show that you are strong, capable, self-sufficient, confident, and most importantly are consistent in the choices and decisions you make.

5. Be willing to make a change – If you want your wife back, or your ex girlfriend, you need to be willing to change to meet her needs, and to ensure your needs are met too. Don’t forget, even if you and your ex renew your relationship, it cannot be based on the same foundation as before or it will simply fail again.
Remember, only after you have completed your own inner soul searching can you attempt to patch things up with your ex lover.


For more information:-

How To Get Your Ex Wife Back

Author: Julie Campbell
Over Doesn’t Mean It’s Over ...
Suffering a breakup can cause many new and negative feelings to occur, but this doesn’t mean that the feelings of love you had for your ex wife diminish right away. Loving feelings that were shared usually remain strong between two people well after they choose to part ways.
You need to take advantage of these feelings instead of wasting your time on the negative emotions that make you feel hurt, betrayed, guilty or angry towards your ex lover. If you want to improve your chances of getting your wife back, you need to forgive your partner, forgive yourself, and convince her that the love you had still remains.
So how can you get your ex wife back? Here are few helpful hints. Note: these hints can also be used if you are not married and would like to rebuild your relationship with your ex girlfriend.
Use the past to help your present and improve your future – Your ex fell in love with the past you, but is having trouble finding that spark of love with the current you. What was it that made your ex wife fall in love and enjoy spending time with you? What was it about your personality that she found irresistible? You need to find out what has changed and become the person she fell in love with.
Take the time to engage in positive communications with your ex – Whether you call her on the phone, send her an email, pass her on the street, or meet her for coffee, treat your communications as you would a first date. In other words, don’t try to come on too strong. Keep conversations light and friendly, and reminisce about the good times. Be sure to laugh, smile, and above all, be yourself. Furthermore, never delve in the negative aspects of your past partnership. There will be enough time to effectively sort through any problems you may have once you are closer to getting your wife back.
The goal is to take it slow and show your ex lover that you still think and care about her.
Be aware of your physical appearance– Do not make the mistake of neglecting your physical appearance. As time wears on in a relationship it is common for us to become lazier with our appearance when in the presence of our loved one. Remind your ex wife you still have the style and the looks that once charmed and caught her eye. If need be, give yourself a full makeover, and don’t forget to wear the cologne or a particular outfit she liked on those few occasions when you “accidentally” run into her.
Show self-respect – Don’t count on getting back with ex if you appear desperate or needy. You need to have self-worth, confidence, and emotional stability. You want her to be attracted to you, not resent you - or worse - pity you.
If you want your ex lover to realize that you both still love each other very much, and you want you wife back for another chance at your relationship, the bottom line is you need to show her that you are still the person she fell in love with.

For more information:-